Finally!

After approximately 31 tries...

we're finally pregnant!! 

Get the full scoop on GodKnits.com

What to expect postpartum

This is great information for expecting moms about what to expect postpartum!

What Nobody Told Me About Mesh Panties

 

I ovulated!

Phew!!!

As you know if you've been around for a while, we've "tried" over 20 times in the last three-plus years but I haven't actually done my official FAM charting. Until now. I decided that if we're serious, I better show it, as per the previous post.

So I got back to taking my temperature at the same time every day and recording fluid, symptoms, etc. Based on my last cycle, I figured I'd ovulate around day 18 this time and, much to my surprise, my temperature went from 97.3 to 98 on day 19! And it has stayed well above the cover line in the five days since, and went all the way up to 98.3 today! 

Implantation wouldn't occur until post-ov day 9 at the earliest. I had ovulation spotting with one of the pregnancies, but it's no guarantee. What I'm really looking for is getting to day 13 post ovulation, when I had positive pregnancy tests before. That will be April 12. Or a third clear rise in temperatures to indicate a rise in progesterone!

I really need to get my hands on both boys' fertility charts to compare! But of course it's been almost eight years since I last got pregnant. Gulp.

I feel very relieved that I do seem to be ovulating! And my temperatures indicate good hormone levels. So that's encouraging.

The crazy thing is, we'd conceive in April and be due in December...just like with the miscarriage. Wouldn't that be something?

P.S. I've added a D3 supplement to my arsenal. That was my only deficiency when I was last tested so I figure, why not try to get it up to normal??


 

My trying to get pregnant arsenal

The hubby and I have had a chance to regroup recently and have decided to really have a go at TTC. I've been treating it rather half-heartedly and need to COMMIT.

So we're getting back in the game. I thought I'd share with you 

my trying to get pregnant arsenal. 

This is my TTC Bible. I stopped taking the Pill in 2003 after about a year. The story is, I started on the Pill when Drew and I were a few months away from our wedding. Then a Catholic gentleman I worked with gave me a brochure about the effects of the Pill and it was eye-opening. The idea of a pill making my body inhospitable to a fertilized egg was not in line with my beliefs and values so I was considering not taking it anymore when my backpack was stolen out of my car--with my pills in it. "Message received, God."

I then decided to teach myself the Fertility Awareness Method, ordered this book, and started right away with charting. I still pick it up on occasion when I have a fertility-related concern.

This is the 2015 anniversary edition of Taking Charge of Your Fertility on Amazon.

There are FREE printable fertility charts from TCOYF, too, so they're ready to go. I've used them dozens of times over the years and they'll tell me a LOT about what's going on with my body. They look like this.

Print yours by clicking here.

I also ordered a new basal thermometer so I can chart my temperature (along with cervical fluid and other fertility signs). Using this method, we got pregnant with Andrew after about four official tries then got pregnant twice in a row after that ON THE FIRST TRY.

I'm 38 now and we've "tried" over 20 times now to now avail so it's time to big out the big guns again. Here's the one I ordered on Amazon. Basal thermometer.

For me, the most important features are that it takes your temperature quickly and recalls your last temperature. So I can take my temperature at 7:00am every morning, even if I don't write it down until later in the day (when I'm not half asleep and it's not dark).

I also ordered these ovulation detection strips from Amazon.

My cycles have been between 27 and 31 days lately so that means I need to test from about day 13 to 18 to tell if I'm experiencing a surge.

Naturally, when you're TTC, you're going to wonder if you're pregnant...so I went ahead and bought a big ol' pack of pregnancy test strips, too. Pregnancy test strips from Amazon.

When I talked to my ob/gyn about taking prenatal vitamins (they often upset my stomach), she suggested forgoing the usual and instead just taking a folic acid supplement. There's not much to them so I just got these Folic acid tablets.

{If you've heard anything recently for or against folic acid, please let me know!}

I'm also determined to keep stress levels low, cut back on sugar again and just take better care of myself in general. After the holidays, I never quite returned 100% to my healthy eating habits (I'm looking at you, Lay's potato chips).

We're feeling ready!

Of course I'll keep you updated on our TTC progress. Hopefully charting officially will increase our odds because I'm not getting any younger!


 

2015 wrap-up

I cannot believe 2015 is about to come to a close. It's been a really incredible year with many amazing opportunities. It's also been exhausting!

Here are a few reflections and updates for you.

We are in fact still TTC (Trying To Conceive). I'm not taking any drastic measures, we're just doing what we know to do and trusting God. There are days when I'm not sure I can handle starting over, and other days when I ache to bring another child into the world...so we just take it a day at a time and remain "open to life."

Two years ago, I kicked my sugar addiction. And I've been gluten, wheat and cow's milk-free for about 18 months and I feel better than I have in, well, my entire life.

This was me right around my birthday in November 2015, wearing my second-hand top and size 6 Levi's!

The boys are now 10 (yikes!) and 6. They're so precious and we are incredibly blessed that they are kind, smart, strong, thoughtful boys, and so good to each other. They both earned new belts recently in karate and are getting all As in school. They love playing video games, making up stories to act out with their Angry Birds plushies, and riding their scooters to the park.

Andrew age 10 and Ethan age 6

I'm making some adjustment for my business in 2016, primarily because I want to publish a book about the miscarriage story. My main focus is helping work-at-home moms elevate their image and expand their influence so they can have their work, family and faith in harmony and pursue God's best for their lives. You can find out more on my work with me page.

For this space, I hope to encourage more women in 2016 who are experiencing unexpected setbacks on the journey of motherhood, from infertility to unplanned pregnancies. My work at the Pregnancy Care Center of Chandler will continue and I hope to host some support groups as well.

In 2016, I hope to get back to walking, yoga, herbs and essential oils--some of my loves that were placed on the back burner for too long!!

If you're reading, I'd love to connect with you so feel free to email me at tabitha@tabithadumas.com or say hello on my Facebook page.

Let me know how I can support you or what you'd like for me to blog about!

Wishing you all the best in 2016 and beyond.

 

Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day

It's October 15, Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day. 

My candle is lit tonight as I honor the mamas who have lost babies or who have struggled with infertility as well as those who have aborted babies. If you are one of those women, I'm praying for you tonight.

When we had an early miscarriage in 2009, I was very honest about what happened and was AMAZED at how many other women had lost babies. It's heart breaking. And it's the reason I started God Knits.

I do have a private Facebook group for God Knits if you'd care to join, where we can support and encourage each other (or vent or cry or whatever you want). It's private but I believe you can request to be added.

God Knits Facebook group

If you aren't aware, we've been trying to get pregnant off and on for exactly three years now, a total of 18 times to date. I finally bought some ovulation predictor strips to try out and if that doesn't work soon, we'll both get checked out to see what's going on. There's also a chance that we'll just resign ourselves to the idea that it's not meant to be.

We also know that, well, I'm almost 38. It has been difficult at times but now, it's almost to the point where I don't even care anymore. I know that if it happens, it will be in God's perfect timing, just like every time before (we got pregnant on the first try twice in a row!). And if it doesn't, I am OK with that. But if I seem a little sad every 34 days or so, you'll know why.

This motherhood stuff is hard, plain and simple. And that's why we're here.


 
 

Did you have a traumatic birth?

I ran across this article today on Mothering.com: The Secret Many Moms are Keeping

I believe it's true--many women that had traumatic births don't ever take the time to process it or heal from it as they move on to recovering themselves and caring for their newborn. Sometimes they think they're OK ("Hey, I got a healthy baby out of it") but the pain resurfaces years down the road.

You may not know that my first birth was what many people would label traumatic--if you consider an emergency hospital transfer traumatic. You can read the full story here: Andrew's birth story

The hard thing is that we'll never know if we could have avoided going to the hospital if I'd been checked sooner, or if we'd have ended up at the hospital, anyway. Of course if I'd been in the hospital from the start, it's possible that there would have been interventions and a very different outcome, too.

The hardest part is that my vision for my birth was completely taken away from me. Rushing to the hospital at the "ready to push" phase was no picnic, nor the chaotic twenty minutes between our arrival and his. Not hearing "It's a boy!", not holding him until after an hour, worrying about whether he was OK, not knowing what was going on with ME...definitely not what I'd been hoping for.

I look back and wish that the midwives would have checked me sooner. I wish Drew had insisted. I wish I'd known what the urge to push felt like and that they'd coached me to push harder.

YES, I met my goal: natural child birth and a healthy baby. But the rest of it was ripped away from me.

My recovery was challenging, too, and not being able to sit up unassisted for several days meant that I quickly learned how to nurse laying down, which meant that we surreptitiously became a co-sleeping family.

Birth is rarely what we expect it to be. In fact, with my second, I was determined to have another natural birth, even if it was "as bad" as the first. But instead it was absolutely by the book, even to the amazement of my nurses and doctor. We started timing contractions at 3am, left for the hospital around 6am, was all set up in the delivery room by 7am and he was born at 8:21am!! They put him on my chest and let the cord stop pulsing and I held him for almost an hour before they took him to clean him up, then returned him immediately to me and we've been together ever since. SUCH a different story.

The important thing, I think, is that women need to share their stories. The good, the bad and the traumatic. We need to process it, to know that other women have been there, too, to hear stories that were better or worse than ours. It's powerful and it aids in the healing process.

If you'd like to join a small community of supportive women, join my Facebook group: God Knits Facebook group

Women need each other! I hope to facilitate more conversations in the future. In the meantime, journal your thoughts and feelings or talk to a trusted friend. Or call me! (602) 349-1129